Um, okay except that I was so fucking miserable today that I made myself eat.
But there's still hours left in the day to fast, and a proper fast tomorrow, and Saturday...
The monster will not win.
I WILL WIN.
Additionally, I've done some estimating, and I've lost about 5lbs in about 8 days. So my small improvements have been yielding moderate results. If I started making large improvements, hopefully I'll start seeing some spectacular results! Yes? Yes? Hmm...
Today I recoiled away from a banana but ate chips. I was afraid of anything but those chips. Why was that? It's so odd, because bananas are one of my "safe" foods, but suddenly they became completely off-limits, but these chips, these oily chips weren't scary in the slightest. I was making guacamole for my brother and was terrified to even let my hands touch the avocado meat. I dropped the pit and had to pick it up, only to get some of the green mush on my fingers, and felt like I had just touched the most wretched thing on earth. And avocados are like, absolutely my favorite food ever. But these chips that any other day I would have avoided like the plague, I ate them; they were the only thing I could eat. What the heck?
My brain has its priorities severely confused.
My brain works that way too. Fruit? Hell no. Doughnuts sitting in the kitchen? Possibly.
ReplyDeleteThanks for posting that video. I've heard so much about Skins but never looked into it and I am now [:
xoxo