Forcing myself to eat some soup right now. I don't know why. I'm going out tonight most likely to be disappointed, because no one fucking likes me. I'm thinking and maybe it's not that I'm fat, and maybe it's not that I'm ugly, but perhaps (and probably) it's because I have a really shitty personality. And maybe it's not that I make a bad first impression, it's just that I make no impression at all. Feeling down. And there's no one to pull me up. My fucking friends don't trust me. And I only have like three fucking friends.