I end up in this place all the time. I was going to write a blog post about how terrible my relationships with other people make me feel, but I decided that it would be more efficient for me to draw a graph.

See below: Graph Of My Confidence and Happiness in My Friendships Over Time

As you can see, the graph begins with a short period of stability. This is what I will (for a short time) believe to be loneliness. Then I have an ok day, and my feelings of confidence and happiness in my friendships increases a little. Then something happens like my best friend blowing me off for no good reason and there's a dip in my happiness, followed by a period that's lower than the initial period of loneliness. I thus have entered a state of loneliness I was previously unaware existed. After a bit of a rocky climb back to happiness, you see that I stay at a high point for quite some time. This state may have been reached by a series of heart-to-hearts, a sleepover, or even something as simple as getting phone calls on a regular basis. I feel really confident in my friendships at this point: I'm not paranoid they're talking behind my back, I feel like I can talk to them about stuff. Then something happens, for example, my best friend blowing me off three times in one weekend for no good reason, or maybe not calling or even texting me once while I've been deathly ill for the past three days even though she has plenty of time to talk to everyone else in the world, and I drop into a low that I never knew existed. I think, for a period of time, that this is absolute loneliness. Usually at this point, something gets my hopes up and I return back to a fleeting moment of stability and happiness in my friendships, only  to drop right back down to "absolute" loneliness... which, after a while, is followed by another decrease in confidence and happiness in my friendships, which is even lonelier than I thought my most lonely point was. This is when the graph ends, because this is the point where I decide that I don't have any friends and it's not like I even gave a fuck anyway. The graph stops here because to have a Graph of Confidence and Happiness Of My Friendships Over Time, I would need to actually, y'know, have friends, which I don't.