Today, my mom came home with cake. The most ginormous, delicious, heaping portion of soft, mushy yellow cake and crusty sugary icing... I believe it had the remnants of some words iced onto its face but I certainly did not notice/care. And it's just sitting there, in the fridge, in plan sight of Me, covered clumsily by a plastic plate, jauntily perched on top of its mushy goodness and I can see it.
Today, I was suddenly struck by a sinister feeling of hunger. It came out of nowhere, but it was strong, and felt comparable to what I assume getting hit by a metaphorical train would feel like. I calculated my calories and realized that GASP I AM LIKE ALMOST AT 900 CALORIES HOW DID THIS HAPPEN. Then I realized that I was calculating in food that I never actually ate, and that my potato + two pieces of toast would only put me at like 700 calories. It was more than I had planned, but I didn't care.
Today, as I was cooking my potato, pouring over the sizzling spray-Pammed-pan I hear a knock at the door. It's my brother. What is he doing outside? Wait, hasn't everyone been asleep all day? Certainly I'm the only one who exists in this world. No. It was him and my mom coming back from The Store with an appalling amount of groceries. The following series of events, while troubling, panicked me enough to lose part of my appetite, and all desire to eat the toast, so I am happy to say I am still at 590 calories.
As they brought the food in, I noticed all the cereal. Cereal. I can't eat cereal, usually. It's just... too much. Too many calories. It's a good thing to c/s though. Weird, because so are crackers. And they got crackers. Three kinds of crackers. I am simultaneously in heaven and hell right now! Crackers are by far my favorite food, and they got Ritz, saltines, and oyster crackers for chrissakes! To make things worse, my mom bought me three of these Amy's dinner bowl things... which I'm sure are absolutely, mind-blowingly delicious, but two of them are 290 calories, and one of them is 390 calories. Whuuuuut? One of these would be fine if it was the only thing I ate in a day, but I just don't work like that.
Or I could have a massive chew/spit episode, where I demolish Cap'n Crunch, other cereals, cake, crackers, crackers, crackers, and the Amy's food. My life is becoming one big alliteration and it's ccccrazy.
Oh and she got me avocados, too. Fuck.
Ahhh, it sucks when that happens! I know exactly how you feel. At the moment, there are snack cakes, candy, ramen and Sunchips sitting pretty behind me, in all their gooey sugary salty crunchy chocolaty moist glory, compliments of my mother.
ReplyDeleteArghhhhh!
A big variety of food is the worst! You can avoid though, I know you can, and you know you can as well! You want skinny so bad, and this food is just taunting you, so don't let it win! Stay strong, sweetie :)
ReplyDeleteStay Strong! xxxx
ReplyDeletewhy must parents do this to us? once my dad spontaneously brought home amazingly delicious empanadas (my weakness) and I had 4 in about 10 minutes. fuckity.
ReplyDeletebut cake.. wow. i dont know if i would be able to resist that. i say c/s ALLLLL of it and get it over with haha